Friday, October 30, 2009
I have never been one to dwell on feelings. It doesn't do a lot of good and in my short 36 years, I've learned the best way to go about life is just get up and "do."
I've always tired of people who talk about "feeling inadequate" Again, don't feel "inadequate" just go about your life, working hard and you don't have time to feel inadequate.
That said, personally for me, the last month has been a hard one. From managing my four crazy kids, one of them being a very strong-willed three year old who fights with me on everything (like a lot of three year olds I know, so I know there are many mothers dealing with hard toddlers), to trying to be a caring, consistent wife, to full-filling assignments asked of me from family, friends, church and school, I have dropped the ball on many things this month. Dinner has been made in my house, I think 10 times this month, my house is always messy, a job that should take 10 minutes seems to drag out for hours because of constant interruptions from phone, family and friends. At one point this week, I discovered I had cross-scheduled five different things--parent-teacher conference during piano, volunteering at the Book Fair (the one volunteer thing I do at the school because my husband can be home with my kids and I don't have to leave them with babysitters) at the same time as my kid's golf lessons, a piano tuner coming when my kids were doing their Halloween programs, etc. And, just an FYI, my kids are only allowed one musical activity (piano) and one sport (golf/dance). My kids are not scheduled for every whim or activity on the planet. I have been very methodical about this.
At the end of the day, in trying to figure out why things are the way they currently are, I had that crushing feeling of "you are inadequate." It was overwhelming and sat on me like a load of bricks. I am not "that person" and truth be known, it scared me. I honestly, stood up out of my chair to try and physically remove the emotional feeling. (It didn't work.)
Why am I posting this? Because I often am the first person to tell people to "suck it up" and my basic message to the world is just that, "Don't dwell, do." Well, for the record, I get it now. I get how easy it is to dwell and replay over and over in one's head thoughtless things said, get offended and carry that around. I now get how easy it is to not fight back the feelings of inadequacy and let them come tumbling around you.
That said, last night, as I was wiping away my 5th round of tears in 48 hours and I am not a crier, (honestly, ask my husband), I decided to fight back. Lists are in place, a plan is in action and I am getting back my "warrior" feeling. Time to "not dwell and just do." Time to get to work.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
When I was 21, I was a missionary for my church in downtown Salt Lake City on Temple Square. I spent my days giving tours in English and Spanish.
On Sunday mornings, the Mormon Tabernacle Choir does a live broadcast from The Tabernacle. A few minutes before the broadcast would end, we sister missionaries would stand outside the Tabernacle with our signs letting visitors know that they could get a tour in their own language. I loved standing there with my fellow missionaries waiting for the tours to begin. It was always so exciting and fun knowing we would all be sharing our beliefs to people in many different languages.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Once upon a time, there was a young girl from Boulder, CO who fell in love with a dental student from Salt Lake City, UT. This boy loved cars and this girl didn't know or even care much about them. Whenever they were in the car together, dental student would point out cars and say their names, cost, and what made them special. Young girl would smile and nod because she was in love but she didn't get it. However, one car would grab her attention and she would say, "Hey, I like that one."
Dental student would roll his eyes and say, "That is a Miata. That is a neat car, one of best cars to come out in the early 90s but there so many other amazing ones out there now." Dental student and young girl got married, moved back to Utah, bought two different houses, two different dental practices, and had four kids. During all that time, every time she would see a Miata, she would say, "Dentist husband, what kind of car is that?" It was always a Miata. It became a joke between the two of them. He would say, "There could be a $100,000.00 dollar car next to a Miata and you would always point out the Miata."
Dentist husband surprised his wife, Janice, with a new retractable hard-top Miata. He called it her "Book Club" car since it has no practical value and can only hold two people. But, this Miata says to her how much he loves her and how much he appreciates having been with her for 14 years. She got teary, they laughed and hugged each other and went for ride, just the two of them.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
I took toothsome #4 for her three year old picture. I have used Kiddie Kandids for all of my kids until they start school. I have had some good and some very bad experiences there. But, I must say, that when I have had a bad experience, they have been wonderful at fixing any problems when I have asked to speak to a manager.
During the summer, I bought Shannon Hale's "The Actor and Housewife". I read it at the beach and didn't like it. I was glad to be done with it.
However, most of my friends who have read it really liked it. That is why I bought it for a beach read. These are friends who I trust their book recommendations. But, again, I did not like it and don't want it taking up space in my house. I will never reread it and I won't recommend it.
So, with full warning, I am willing to give it to anyone who wants it. It is hardcover and has a little bit of sand in its pages. First person to request it, gets it. If I don't have your address, include it in the request. I have a ton of things I need to mail by the end of the week, so if I need to mail it to you, it will likely leave my post office by Friday.
Friday, October 16, 2009
I bought this cockroach costume in the summer. I noticed it three years ago and spent the last three years waiting for it to go on sale and to talk my 10 year old into wearing it. I think it is hilarious. Maybe because I remember cockroaches about this size (ok, slightly smaller) when I lived in Costa Rica as a child.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
We posted the new book for the month of October on the Book Blogging Babes site. It is Infidel by Ayaan Hirsi Ali. Liz picked it and her reads always stretch me. I often get stuck reading more "fluff" and she always tackles hard, but important subject matters.
If you want to read it, feel free and then post your review on your blog at the end of the month and I will link to it from the BBB blog. Just leave me a comment on the BBB site, so I can find you.
I love books and I love to share that love with others.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Today, I took my kids to the bus stop and noticed a small, almost imperceptible change but it was indeed there. All of the kids were playing together more than they have in the past. I noticed groups of girls talking and laughing, boys playing football and general running around. This goes on daily but since Sunday, there seems to be a better sense of unity. I rethought it several times to see if I was "making this up" but it was indeed there.
Why? Sunday they announced ward boundary changes and for the first time since we have lived here, all of the kids in our "closed " neighborhood (meaning we have three entrances off the same street that are the only way to come and go into our neighborhood) are in the same ward. (Which for the handful of non-Mormon readers means we will all be attending the same church at the same time on Sunday.) As adults, we were thrilled and my kids seemed excited about it but I wasn't sure if they got what the ward boundary changes meant.
Looking at the bus stop today, I think they do. They seemed to be nicer to each other and feel good about including every one now that they knew we were all going to be together on Sunday. That might not seem like a big deal, just one more day when they have six other days in the same neighborhood but in the Mormon culture, that one day is not just one day. It means that during the week, the girls will go to Activity Days together and the boys will go to Scouts together. It means Primary parties, ward parties, church visits, service projects and often more such activities together. So, even though they are young, they got it. They were even more friendly with me. Before, I was the crazy mother, who always drove her kids to the bus stop and waited and watched until the bus came. Occasionally I hollered out to one of them to not run into the road or stop throwing snowballs at cars but for the most part, I was just a presence to let the kids know an adult was there. Today, I was Sister Janice Dentist Wife, the lady who is going to be in their ward.
I can just feel how good this is all going to be.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Today, Toothsome #2 was baptized. In the Mormon church, children get baptized at the age of 8. Today was a wonderful day and I am so proud of Toothsome #2 for deciding to get baptized.
Toothsome #2 with her daddy. I was baptized in this same dress.
All three of us.
No, we won't be using this as our Christmas card photo. :)
Cute Toothsome #2
Afterwards, we had everyone over for lunch. It took the easy way out and had it catered by Kneaders. It was tasty and so easy.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
I woke up yesterday, knowing it was going to be a busy day. I had a lot going on and I knew I needed to be on top of things if it wasn't going to fall completely to pieces around me.
It started when toothsome #4 woke up. It was her birthday and our family tradition is to all immediately go downstairs, sing Happy Birthday and open presents. It makes for a busy morning because Dentist husband still has to leave for work and I have to still get the other kids off to school, but we all love doing it. So, after she opened her presents, (she wanted "pink and purple things"), we immediately went into, "Eat, get dressed, grab your backpack, lets go to the bus stop " mode. So, I didn't get all of the wrapping paper or the boxes from present opening picked up.
When I got home from getting my kids off to school, I immediately headed upstairs to fold the pile of laundry from our California trip. I left toothsomes 3 and 4 downstairs playing while I did this. I kept on getting distracted by phone calls, seeing other things that needed to be done when I went to put clothes away in my kids rooms, etc. So, by the time I got downstairs, I discovered a MESS of amazing proportions downstairs caused by toothsomes 3 and 4. I started to have that panicky feeling but looked at the clock and realized I need to feed toothsome #3 and get him off to Kindergarten. Once I got him off, I had some errands to do and got home later than planned.
I had just walked in the door, when a good friend stopped by to drop off a book she had borrowed. I invited her in, explaining that my house was a mess. As we are walking toward my Great Room, I start really noticing how bad it is. The whole time I was talking to her, I'm thinking in the back of my mind, "Oh dear, this is way worse than I realized." I tried to just act like, "Oh, this is fine" but truth be known, I was thinking, "How did it get this bad in one morning? This is awful."
Anyway, she left and I started to quickly pick things up but made little progress. About a 1/2 hour later my kids came home from school and had another Kindergartner girl with them. If her Mom doesn't make it to the bus stop on time, then she walks home with my kids and her mom gets her from my house. So, they walk in and then the door bell rings. It is this little girl's mom and within minutes after that, eight Cub Scouts and my den leader partner come parading into my house for den meeting. Five minutes later, a lady from church showed up to talk to toothsome #2 about her baptism coming up. At this point, I have 11 people in my house that don't live there, plus me and my four kids. About 1/2 way through the meeting two other Mom's show up to see how den meeting is going, so the number goes up to 13.
With about 10 minutes left in den meeting, my doorbell rings again and is the man who installed my tile back splash, who is coming to seal my grout. Within, five minutes after that, a friend shows up with a birthday gift for toothsome #4.
And, my house is messier than I have seen in months! The whole time, I am smiling, and talking and acting like this is normal in my house but secretly thinking, "I really hope these people don't go home and say, 'Man, Janice really has an a messy house. How do they live like that?'"
The evening doesn't go any smoother, Dentist husband comes home, I took my kids to piano, I grabbed Mexican take out for dinner and collapsed into bed at 10:30 pm. I have a ton of cleaning to do. So, to Alissa, Ruth, Tennille, Kristy, Sandy, Michelle, Kristen, 8 Cub Scouts, Greg my tile man, I apologize for the chaos in my house yesterday. Feel free to stop by today around 5:00 pm and things should be clean again. But, then again, I just remembered, I won't be home because I will picking my daughter from activity days and taking two kids to golf lessons.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
It was my kids "Fall Break" this past week and in a very "last minute" decision, we decided to go to California. Through Hotwire, we were able to find a scream of a deal at the Hyatt Resort in Irvine and off we went.
Of course, we had to eat the Crab Cooker. (Don't let my kids bored faces fool you, they LOVE this place--particularly their Clam Chowder.)
We spent every day there at the beach.
And, of course, we had to go and get "Balboa Bars" on the peninsula. This time, my oldest asked if he could get a snow cone instead. We said sure, not knowing that it was going to be large enough to feed a family of six. Look at that thing!
It was a fast, delightful trip.
Now, back to piano practicing, reading, scouts, activity days, dance, golf, etc.